Saturday, June 2, 2012

tryin to liberate my own mind

I have been looking for work. I have some work, but not enough. I have found it very difficult to do other things that I have to do including my walk with God because I have that nagging feeling in the back of my mind saying, hey-you're unemployed slob!

But I am doing everything in my power to remedy the situation.

Could it be another way in which God is trying to teach me to let go of my man-made religion? Well, I might as well try to learn something from this unpleasant experience.

When you have a good job, it is real easy to feel good about yourself. And when you don't, it is REAL easy to feel bad about yourself. But are either one of those things based on anything less than an illusion?

It is MY responsibility as the man of my house to provide. No doubt about that. But, I am still the same person today as I was before I got laid off and I am still just as hard of a worker.

I've been told in the past to try to see what God is teaching you in every situation in your life. So, maybe God is trying to teach me not to put as much stalk in what I do for a living. Or maybe He is trying to teach me to trust Him.

Maybe He is trying to teach me humility. But I have to admit, being unemployed is humiliating. lol i dont know why and i dont know if that's how other people feel or not. But I find my own behavior strange because I know if I score a job on Monday I will probably feel 100% better about myself and I'm not really sure if that's a good thing? Either way, I need a job.

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